As if you didn’t know by now, we’re the shit and we’re always Clownin’!! Expect to hear… Skeet’s Lack of an Intro, “How’s your girlfriend!?”, “When’s the next time you gonna get some pussy!?”, Custody Battles, Black & 36 on the Maury Povich Scale, Three Dr. Dre Albums in 20 Years, Compton’s Mount Rushmore, DJ Quik, Venus & Serena, Van Halen, Motley Crue, Red Hot Chili Peppers, & Rage Against the Machine, Ice Cube, Inglewood Mount Rushmore, Tyra Banks, High School Permits, Long Beach Represent, Snoop Dogg & Cameron Diaz, Baron Davis & Kate Hudson, “I think I bought weed from him!’, Torrance, CA, “You gotta be at least 60 to get me back to the Hood!”, “What’s up with that Red 49er Jacket!”, The Circle of Ass, The Matrix, Rage Against the Machine Rapes Eric B. and Rakim with a Guitar, Nick Van Exel, The Gumby, The Duck Tail, Shawn Kemp, Dominique Wilkins, Vince Carter, Best In-Game Dunker Ever… Shaquille O’Neal, Kobe Bryant and the Scoring Title, Hollywood Walk of Fame, and Magic vs. The Great One. You’ve been blessed!
Have any of you guys out there been cheated on? Knowing our fans, I’m sure most of you raised your hands, but this is a first for me and I’m taking it hard. Two-Time Babe of the Week, Irina Shayk was my dirty little secret for years, but now that’s she’s on the cover of Sports Illustrated, she’s the newest hot chick everyone wants to know about. I guess I’m happy for her, I just wish things could go back to the way they were.
It’s never been a secret that Alcohol is the fuel of The Bush, but because we don’t stay flooded with Jack Daniels and Malt Liquor 24/7, sometimes it takes a few minutes for the Blood Alcohol Level to reach Optimal Comedic Output. This is one of those shows… Expect to hear about Our Boys in Prison, “You did your nickel in Chino!”, Turn’T Out, The Other White Meat, Skeet’s YouTube Intervention, Skeet and Big Sexy @ Your Bachelor Party, “You think Prince has Fucked a Dude?”, Charlie Murphy, “Just cause I called you Boo on the phone”, Old Super Bowl and UFC Predictions, Skeet Breaks Down the UFC, MMA vs. Boxing, Homo Erotic Sports, No Cheerleaders, and What Halftime Show? You know you love it!
I know I’ve been slippin’ a little with the Babes of the Week, but they’re like Skeet’s Back Splash, I have to be motivated to share. Don’t worry Mandrake, I promise one this Friday though. As for this show, we’re Just Clownin’ again. Listen for Skeet to try and get everyone to hate him, The Lazy Eye Staring Contest, 4 Camera Angles in 3D, Jacking Off in a Car, Perverted Justice, “Oh yeah, that’s just Jeff!”, Seven Figure Ballin’, The Bush Hall of Fame, Lazy Fans, “You would miss us!”, Baby Seals & Canola Oil, “Hey haters… guess what I’m gonna say next week!”, Come Home Lo Main, The Latest in Internet Porn, Webcam Bitches & Masturbating Amateurs, 3% Jerk, Jerking to the Home Shopping Network, “…you’re part Asian!”, Can You Jack Off With Your Mom on the Phone?, The Pimp Olympics, From Soft to Nut with your Mom on the Phone, Finishing 3rd, “You should’ve told me to talk dirty!”, and “When you was a kid you used to like sucking these titties!”. Yes we went there people!
Bushtopia was Grand! All the Bitches and All the Cheap Alcohol you can consume, but just like his girlfriend… Skeet wasn’t satisfied! For reasons we really don’t get into, Skeet felt the need to leave the Cozy Confines of Bushtopia to start his own country… Skeetdopia and declare war with all of us peaceful citizens still residing on The Bush. These are the blow-by-blow details of Skeet’s Assault plans and then the plan I have just to Blow them Up! Chose your Side Wisely Bitch, I got Nukes!
Wouldn’t it be the shit if Skeet and Big Sexy could start a Country from Scratch? The Location, The Government, The Laws, The Olympics… Everything! We know it’s random as hell, but seriously think about it! We could build the greatest empire in the history of the planet! Without further ado, Welcome to Bushtopia!
There’s plenty of shit to be learned in this world, and lucky for you, Skeet and Big Sexy have all the game to take your lameness to the next level. This time around we explore the Things Men Should Never Admit. After we get rolling we explore places Men Should Never Go… Like the Butthole!! Pay attention!!
Enough with the Bullshit, Let’s get back to Clownin’! How bout All New Shows Everyday this week… Is that something you might be interested in? As for this show expect to hear the Melodious Stylings of Skeet and Barry White, Perm Flowing in the Wind, “Your dad fucked a Bitch to this song!”, “Your Cup is Half Full With Pimp Juice”, “I’m Barry White and I’m gonna get you Laid Tonight!”, David Bowie – Fame, “When I went to Prom Night with my cousin…”, Some Pig, To Topic or Not To Topic, Your White Laws, Unicorns and Cocaine, AZ’s Teeth, Yankee Wankees, Phone in my Left Hand, Cock in my Right Hand, “We’ve been way gayer than that!”, “When you’re willing to take a cock, it’s hilarious!”, “I didn’t even answer, I just nutted!”, Pubic Hair and Video Game Controllers, Skeet’s Girlfriend?, When is Big Sexy getting Pussy?, Fucking a Four, Shoulder to Shoulder in a Mazda Miata, Big Australia but Bigger, “I’m bout to bust Puss!”, Skeet’s Take on Fat Single Moms, and Skeet and Big Sexy – The Wedding Crashers. Everybody Lighten Up!
Happy Valentine’s Day to all you filthy, butt hurt, sensitive little bitches out there! Skeet accomplished what he wanted from the Callin’ Out Names episode by getting all of you riled up and lashing out. But we still know that all of you love us, and because we kinda like you back, here comes a new show just in time for the least holy of all the holidays. And we brought the fire this time around, too! Unintentional Celibacy and Monogamy, That’s The Bush in 2011, plus Skeet finally admits to his favorite Pastime, Cunnilingus. Enjoy!
So here’s the deal… Usually, before the week I’ll schedule shows ahead of time to free up my week so I’m not a slave to this dumbass website like in the past. I thought I scheduled a show for Thursday, but apparently I was wrong. So instead of a Babe of the Week tonight, you get a new show. Now normally in a situation like this I’d toss you a Just Clownin’ Episode and you’d all be happy, but because of the two jokers in the comment board saying I’m slipping with my game, You get this show! Enjoy and watch your mouths, bitches!
Here we go again! Same Shit, Same Toilet, New Week. It’s Skeet’s Back Splash. This time I will admit that he touches on a delicate subject that I wish certain people would admit more often. Oddly enough, involving Delicate Touches. See what I did there…
We had a plan to do a pretty cool little Super Bowl Halftime Show yesterday, but Skeet got so fucked up the night before that he had to spend the day alone at his house in darkness and silence. But whatever, we’re Clownin’ again… We start with The Difference between Sober and Drunk Clownin, The Number of Fans, “NOW DONATE BITCHES!!”, How many of our Fans Hate Us?, Howard Stern, AZ, William in Plano, TX, Lo Main, Chili Frito’s!!, Taco Bell, 49 Cent Tacos, “Stop thinking, Start eating!”, Popeye’s Chicken, The Hybrid Fast Food Restaurant, “Sprite, Fanta, and Steel Reserve Chaser!”, 2nd II None, DJ Diesel at the Club, 1991, Eazy E – I’d Rather Fuck You, Egypt Fighting for Democracy, “As soon as you get Democracy, you get a White Dude!”, Shift to the War on Drugs and Music Downloads, We need The Coon, and What’s More Relevant… Skeet’s Thoughts or Big Sexy’s Game? Either way we all lose a little!
We gave you only 5 Football Picks Shows during the Season and none in the Playoffs. It’s no secret that when the Cowboys and 49ers were out of Playoff contention in September, we were pretty much out of the NFL Season, but the Super Bowl is the Super Bowl. And seeing that I picked the Green Bay Packers to win the Super Bowl way back in August we had to do a show about it. Unfortunately, Skeet took the Clownin’ aspect of the show to another level and brought up some random gay shit, but we get to the point. If you want to win some money, listen to my pick. Go Pack!
Normally, a Hot and Sexy Woman starring in a movie opening this weekend and currently dating a Superstar Athlete doesn’t necessarily scream Babe of the Week. True, Minka Kelly is not a normal looking woman, but when I found out some information about where she came from, and added that to all of her sexiness, this weeks choice was a no brainer.
And now… Another Level of Game! Despite the on going shit talking and clownin’, your boys do have a tremendous amount of Game to share. Not counting the fact that I’ve only been back in the game for a month and Skeet’s been gamed up by his Girlfriend for 2 years now. That’s not the point though. The point is we know shit! With that said, here’s our critique of Mademan.com’s List of the 13 Ways to Have a Threesome.
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